The Accidental Medium

To Our Readers:
This is the continuing email conversation about Ghosts between my old friend McFly and I to help him with his Ghost Tours of New Orleans. Here are Part 1 and Part 2.

Dear McFly,
I trust that you’ve consumed and integrated Manifestations 101.  Now I can explain some of the more unsettling stuff, some of which happens to people with a bit more developed sixth sense.   So let’s continue on with this question:

#3.  How do ghosts manifest themselves?

Ghosts can make things go bump (scrape, rattle, creak) in the night.
There are many noises that ghosts typically make. Footsteps are common, as are doors slamming, floorboards groaning, dishes rattling, pictures falling off walls, chairs creaking like someone is sitting in them.  Then there are the items they actually move to make a noise – like window blinds flying up (thwwwappp!), rockers rocking.  Those are just some of the more classic experiences. To make a noise a ghost has to learn how to manipulate energy but it’s not easy, so each ghost seems to stick to a small bag of “tricks” they do well to grab your attention.  Often it’s something they’ve always done when they were alive.

A new trick.
Just the other night I was lying awake at 3 a.m. looking at the full moon streaming in and suddenly heard a loud grating sound of something scraping along the kitchen floor.  I jumped out of bed and zipped into the kitchen to see if the dog was into something. Freddie was sleeping peacefully on his pillow. The cats were sequestered and snoozing outside on the porch.  But the metal cover on the air vent by the dining room table had been pulled out of its hole in the floor and had been dragged two feet away – hence the grating sound on the tile floor.  Hubby was snoring. Kids were asleep. Pets accounted for. We don’t have mice or other rodents in the house.  My Mom was in the guest bedroom and she too heard the racket.  This is a new trick for our house – Maybe a new ghost? I’ll keep you posted.

Ghosts like knocking.
My first visit to the Queen Mary, I was in my cabin, standing right in front of the cabin door when somebody knocked. I was close enough to look immediately out through the peephole. Nobody. I opened the door and walked down the short corridor to the main passageway and there was nobody.  This has happened a few times while staying on the Queen Mary. It’s an old ship so knocking sounds can be chalked up to a creaky old ocean liner. But considering the ship’s haunted reputation, and combined with all the other incidences that I experienced, it was probably a ghost.

Some Ghosts can Speak.
Ghosts can speak audibly so that an average person can physically hear them – and I believe this feat is accomplished by those who have been a ghost for quite some time, certainly long enough to develop this advanced skill.  When Kate was a baby, I heard the grandmotherly patter of a woman talking to Kate in Kate’s room.  Since I am clairaudient, I thought I was the only one who could hear this.  But my darling hubby, supposedly fast asleep, whipped the covers over his head and whispered loudly. “DID YOU HEAR THAAAATTT?????”  It turned out to be his Mom – she had not crossed over.

Lost Ghosts.
Beatrice, the little girl attached to the antique carousel horse we’d acquired, would cry out “Mommy!!!” in the middle of the night, right in front of me, in the dark. It was a little unnerving, but I realized she was a lost and lonely child who was just looking for her Mom.  (I really must post this story of Beatrice and the carousel horse).

Party Ghosts.
I have also heard ghosts partying – people laughing, glasses clinking, orchestra music playing and people talking. These “scenes” can be ghosts OR they can be imprints from the past and not ghosts… but that’s another story for another email.

If you are somewhat sensitive to the energy of others…
You may feel a ghost’s presence in a room – just like when you walk into your house and you get the feeling you are not alone, that another family member is present somewhere.  Ghosts still have their egos so it’s much easier to feel their energy – it’s not too different from our pwn.

The air feels different.
You may feel a change in air pressure. The room might feel heavy.  You might feel like you need air: It reminds me of some people I know, who walk into a room and suck the air out of it: They take up way more space than their actual size.  Ghosts can have this effect too. There may be a change in temperature – the room gets colder. Or you may feel a cool breeze, yet no window is open, no fan is on.

The hair on the back of you neck may stand up.
Ghosts tend to stand in your personal energy field – your aura – so you feel crowded but nobody is there, at least nobody you can see.  You may get strange tingles, not warm fuzzies, but more like a very mild electric shock.  Not to be confused with paranoia, but you may get an unnerving feeling that someone is watching you.  You may feel slightly or very claustrophobic.

You may get a sense of unease or one of peace.

• Unease is typical if you don’t know the person or they are indeed trying to scare you.  But what’s more likely is your being scared of the unknown while playing with the possibility that you are imagining things or going a little bonkers.
• Peaceful feelings are typical if you are open to the whole aspect of life being much bigger than what you can physically see and are excited about the adventure,  and more so if you are getting the distinct feeling that it’s someone you know who you love.
• If you are sensitive to the energy of emotion, you may even feel the waves of love if someone who loves you is standing by you.

Let’s Talk About Clairsentience.
What we’ve been talking about above – this sensitivity to the emotionally charged energy from others and in the environment – is part of clairsentience. Clairsentience is the ability to feel the emotions and/or physical pain of others.  I read somewhere that about 70% of the population has some clairsentient abilities.  I don’t know how that number was arrived at, but it’s probably fairly accurate. Case in point: I bet you’ve walked into what sounded like a calm room but immediately sensed that all was not well  – that an altercation is taking place.  Most of us can sense emotional discord charging a space.  It feels uncomfortable – it doesn’t match our own energy.

If your clairsentient abilities have developed more significantly you may not only feel the presence of a ghost, and gauge their emotion but you may also feel the way in which they died in your own body.  When I first met Lady Camille, a ghost who was a repeat visitor to the side of Matilda’s crib, her presence made my throat go dry and I felt like gagging, and then I got racing heart palpitations.  I found out later Lady Camille had stopped eating and died 10 days later of heart failure.  (Another story to share on AM.)

You may also feel them touch you.
This was my ultimate worst fear, but when it finally happened, it was not a big deal at all.  I had just finished up presenting a daylong seminar onboard the Queen Mary and was ready to decompress.  I joined friends at a table at the patio bar on the bow of the Queen Mary.

While chatting and waiting to place my drink order, I felt a strong TAP TAP TAP  on the shoulder.  At first I thought it was the server trying to get my attention, or perhaps one of my tablemates. I turned and seeing nobody, turned to the side. Nobody. Was someone playing a trick on me?  You know the one where someone sneaks up beside you but taps your opposite shoulder so when you turn to that side and see nobody, it freaks you out??

Well. nobody was there on either shoulder, and there was nobody close enough that could have tapped me on the shoulder either.  My table mates were seated too far away, and there was nobody seated or walking anywhere near the vicinity of my table.  I sat there with a stunned look on my face. Eventually the ghost revealed himself. A young man dressed in a sailor’s uniform circa WWII stood to one side and waved at me.  Harmless stuff. He was just happy I could see him.

There are ghosts who try to scare or threaten.
These are the lowlifes who just enjoy hanging out with fellow lowlifes.  They scared and threatened people during their lifetime and they keep doing it as a ghost. They get a charge out of it, just as they did in life.  To really stir things up in the physical world, these ghosts need a lot of energy. Where do they get it? Primarily by feeding off the energy you give off in the form of fear. So. The more afraid you are, the more energy you are potentially supplying the ghost who’ll give it right back at ya. You actually create a vicious circle where your own fear will create more fear in you. Therefore, it is essential to NOT be scared when you are in the presence of ghosts.

I know what you’re saying…
“grrrrreaaaat. And how do I do that?”  The key thing to remember – and hardwire this next sentence into your brain circuitry: “WE have control on this side, not ghosts.” Got that? We are in the driver’s seat. Ghosts can cause disturbances but in my experience they can’t actually “do” anything – especially if we aren’t fanning the flames with our own fear.  I’ll talk more about this when we get into psychic protection.

What about those stories of people being killed by ghosts?
Fictional murderous ghost stories aside, I’ve heard stories of real people who’ve had heart attacks or committed suicide from encounters with ghosts.  In my view, that is really their own inability to handle their fear.  The ghost didn’t “do” them in. The person went into fight or flight mode, a knee-jerk reaction into fear.  No thinking 0r choice was involved.  Their reptilian brain took control and they literally scared themselves to death.  Those that differ with my view, believing that ghosts can inflict physical harm of their own accord, may have had bad things happen so their perspective is very different than mine.

I believe perspective is everything.
We really do create our own reality.  People who have a positive outlook about themselves and other people, and view the world as an essentially good place will likely find the good in an unsettling ghost encounter.  These people may generally attract more upbeat ghosts because of their positive energy.  Other people who see the world as a battle between good and evil, who feel under siege in an inherently dangerous place will probably have a very different reaction to a bully ghost.  Their fearful energy may play a part in attracting the nasty ghost encounters.  Key take-away here: Try to remain calm – Be aware that we have control if we choose to exercise it.

Let’s think happy thoughts.
On the upside, encounters with ghosts can force people to come to grips with their own eternal souls. Many people open up spiritually. A ghost encounter is actually a gift…

But how do the “happy” ghosts keep their energy fed?  I’ve felt ghosts seemingly feed off the energy of nature – trees, water and sun.  For others, it’s their innate energy field feeding off the energy of love and connection.

Hubby’s Mom was in ghost form for years-
She is a loving soul, not a tormented one. Adeline knew where she was, and made it clear she was not going to the light. A very sweet lady, she remained insistent that she had to get through to her son. Adeline had died of a stroke – and when she made concerted attempts to get her son’s attention, (I could feel the energy build – like air pressure being pumped up the room and knew she was coming in) Hubby was usually trying to fall asleep. But he would pick up on her energy and get a splitting migraine. Near the end, I had a very stern chat with her about giving her son a crazy headache.  She apologized – but she still wouldn’t tell me what it was about – this was obviously a private mother-son talk.  Maybe she was trying to tell him to take better care of himself?  Quite possibly but there seemed more to it than that.

Adeline has finally gone to the light.
And while Hubby gets headaches they are nowhere near the intensity they were when she was around.  His best friend Sharon has taken Adeline’s place, now watching over her “baby brother” as Sharon used to call him.  I believe Sharon negotiated the passing of the baton and got Adeline to cross over.  I would love to have been a fly on the wall for that conversation! As on earth, Sharon’s straightforward nature comes out with wise and entertaining messages. But as she is Spirit, she’s very calm, patient, doesn’t insist on anything (although she might nudge), and only weighs in when Hubby asks.  Hubby feels her around him regularly.  While Adeline and Sharon are both loving supporters, their energies played out very differently, since one was a ghost, and one was in Spirit from a higher plane.

Sometimes a ghost will choose to reveal himself.
They can choose to be in “human” form or an orb (as I mentioned in the last post).  But first they need to know how to handle their energy to show themselves physically in our lower vibrating world.  It takes a little bit of doing. You don’t need to be clairvoyant to see a ghost. You just need to be sensitive enough to pick up on their energy – and they have to be open to revealing their existence. Ghosts can hide if they want to – or choose to reveal their physical existence.

Energy, baby. It’s all about the energy. (Next up Part 4 – What We Can Learn)

Hugs,
Tida

— With thanks to Spirit for infinite return.
(c) 2010, 2011, 2012 The Accidental Medium. UltraMarine Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.

To Our Readers:
This is the continuing email conversation about Ghosts between my old friend McFly and I to help him with his Ghost Tours of New Orleans.  Here is Part 1, if you haven’t read it yet.

Okay McFly.
Moving on with your next question about ghosts…This is a biggie, so we’ll have to do it in two parts.

#3.  How do ghosts manifest themselves?
There are many ways ghosts make themselves known, from the subtle to the blatant, and a few that are downright scary.  Let’s start with the some of the calmer classics, and milder forms of manifestation.

Ghosts seem pesky.
But most ghosts we encounter are our own dearly departed who just want to make sure we loved ones are okay.  They don’t want to freak anyone out, but they can do just that because sadly, most of us are not that accepting of a bigger reality than the physicality of our three dimensional world.

It usually boils down to us freaking out, and not about ghosts trying to scare us.  As I go through some of the manifestations, be aware that true Spirits (i.e. those who have gone to the light) can do much of this manifestation too. It’s just much harder for true Spirits to operate in our lower vibrational field.

Orbs & Mists.
A ghost can appear to the naked eye as a ball or sphere of light – the orb can be in mid air or can be hovering up near the ceiling. The orb can be a dark or light color – the color doesn’t seem to correlate to an evil energy or a beneficent energy.

Ghosts can appear as a mist. Again it can be a white, gray or dark mist – color doesn’t seem to mean anything although other people may weigh in differently on this detail.  Why do ghosts tend to hang out in misty moors a la Wuthering Heights? Water is an excellent amplifier and transmitter of energy.  A ghost can really come through on a misty moor, or any place with high humidity.

Ghostly Images.
I’m sure you’ve seen photos provided as “evidence” that Ghosts were present in some haunted space: An orb of light has been “caught” on video or a photographic image.  Are the floating balls really a ghost or just a speck on the lens? I don’t discount the former, but recognize that there are other explanations for unusual shapes appearing in an image. Then there are the outlines of faces appearing on an image.  Are the faces real, or a trick of the light?  It’s hard to say.  No doubt there are opportunities for an image to be “adjusted” to make it look like a paranormal experience.

But I also believe that if someone has experienced something with the naked eye their camera will pick it up too.  And let’s say we’re looking through a camera lens, setting up a shot of a beautiful landscape – most of us don’t notice there are hydro wires running through the image until after the photo is taken.  Same things applies to a ghost sighting – if we’re not looking for it we may not see it until we’ve had a chance to review it after the fact.  Keep an open mind, I say. I’ve learned that fact can be far more mind-boggling than any fiction we dream up.

Ghosts are known to move things.
On one of the occasions I was staying on the Queen Mary, during the night everything that I’d brought into the cabin that was sitting on a flat surface moved just about 1 inch to the side – And I mean EVERYTHING – weight didn’t matter.  It wasn’t the maid. It was a little spooky to think a ghost was rearranging my room while I slept.

Beatrice, the little girl ghost attached to the antique carousel horse we were gifted, used to flip my empty incense burners on the floor to let me know she was there. (BTW: Nothing was burnt  – just ashes on the floor).

Ghosts have a penchant for rattling or breaking glass – Pushing a glass so that it falls off a shelf or table onto the floor seems to be a favorite.  It makes a lovely crashing sound and it’s an easy attention-getter because it’s lightweight.

A ghost can leave “gifts” for a loved one to find.
When we were clearing out my grandparents’ house (after my grandmother had died) I found two lovely tobacco boxes. I wanted them. But something told me they really belonged to my brothers: My grandfather had died a long time ago and he and my brothers had spent much time together.  They got them.

My brothers flew home and my Mom and I stayed to finish emptying the house. I’d been working by myself in the basement. It had been a huge job, but the downstairs area was now completely cleared of stuff.  Before we locked up the house, Mom did a final sweep of the main floor to see if we’d left anything behind, and I took a final look of the basement.

There on the empty floor in the basement was a metal tobacco canister of my grandfather’s. It was in perfect condition, although it was obviously quite old.  It still contained some of his tobacco.  I had been the only one in the past week clearing out the vestiges in the basement – not even my Mom had been down there – and I’d never seen this canister before.  The space had been completely cleared out but here was this bright yellow canister. The antique dealer wanted to know if I was going to sell it because it was a collector’s item.  I declined.  It was a gift from my grandfather. Later I discovered my grandfather is one of my main Spirit Guides.

Ghosts can also leave a scent.
I have many examples of this but what first comes to mind is my grandmother. When I went back to get something I’d forgotten from my grandmother’s empty house after we’d just shown it to prospective buyers, my grandmother’s distinct scent of “White Shoulders” perfume was at the front entrance.  I have a very keen sense of smell.  There had been no smell of perfume in the house when we’d cleaned it out.  There was no scent at the front door when I’d locked the door just a few minutes earlier.  My grandmother knew I would know it was her.  I think she approved of the buyers.  We sold the house.

Ghosts love electronics.
Ghosts and their Spirit brethren are energy aficionados. Ghosts especially are always developing their abilities to manipulate energy so they tend to go to town: Lights can flash, computers can crash, printers will jam or go haywire, alarms will go off for no apparent reason, telephones ring with nobody on the other end. Even messages are left and the person leaving them has been dead for some time. You get the picture.

There’s a reason why mirrors were covered during wakes.
On a surprisingly consistent basis, I’ve found mirrors to be the culprits in homes where there have been paranormal disturbances.  There is a theory that suggests ghosts get mixed up and go to a mirror instead of the light.  In my grandparents day, you always covered the mirrors when the home was being used for wakes and visitations (from this side) where the departed one was laid out for viewing on the dining room table.  My advice. Smudge any antique mirrors you might have with sage before you bring them into your house.  (I’ll cover protection in an upcoming post.)

Some mirrors cannot be cleared of other energy and I may advise people to throw those mirrors away.  It depends. If the ghost is a loved one, they aren’t leaving, mirror or no mirror, until their needs are met.

I have a friend who had been disturbed nightly by sounds in her bedroom. One night she woke up, turned on the light and inadvertently looked into an old mirror she’d acquired that was hanging by her bedside.  She saw an old woman’s face that she didn’t recognize staring back at her. I don’t know about you, but that’s enough for me to throw a mirror out, no matter how rare and exotic.

Well, McFly. Before we get into more nitty gritty about things that go bump in the night, I will sign off.  This is enough for you to process for now. More to come… (Part 3 – Manifestations 2.0)

Big hugs,
Tida. (aka The Accidental Medium)

— With thanks to Spirit for infinite return.
(c) 2010, 2011, 2012 The Accidental Medium. UltraMarine Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.

It’s Trick or Treat Time Again.
The leaves are falling and the pumpkins are being carved. My kids have already sorted out their costumes:  Halloween is a big deal around in the Village so the girls are with the program.  Kate is going for the unicorn look. Matilda has eschewed the ubiquitous fairy costume, and chosen her favorite avian, the penguin.  In the midst of our Halloween planning my friend McFly has emailed me for some timely advice.

Mcfly and I go back 20 years, to our salad days in the Caribbean.
We’ve known each other long enough that we never use our real names – He’s McFly because he’s always disliked the stupidity of Biff the bully in “Back to the Future.”  It was Biff’s goal to make Michael J. Fox’s character “McFly” look stupid and inferior at every turn with the now classic put down: “Helloo?? McFly??” In fact it was Biff who didn’t get it and had to learn that there are consequences to one’s selfishness, narrowness and lack of sensitivity.  My friend McFly relishes the fairness in the world when the McFly’s triumph over the Biff’s.

McFly calls me “Tida” after our mutual friend’s so-named cockatiel since, left untamed, my hair has it’s own perverse tendency to stick up like the crest of the aforementioned bird.

We both worked at a dive resort. McFly was honing his craft as a horror fiction writer at the time, paying the bills as a Scuba instructor and boat captain. I worked in resort sales & marketing. McFly often dropped off his stories to the “gals” in the office for us to read between answering calls on the resort’s 800#. Well-written, McFly’s work was not easy-going fare. It really was horror.

Did I mention I am not a huge fan of horror?
I always try to avoid anything having to do with evil, violence, gore, chainsaws, wigged out mental patients, and demented beings along with witches, vampires and ghosts that are gonna get you… McFly and I are close friends so I would faithfully read his material, even though the bloodied-psychopath-to-page ratio was very high.

So this email from McFly is about ghost tours in New Orleans.
Now McFly is a professional photographer who’s made Nawlins his stomping grounds since Katrina.  He manages to make a descent living and supplement it as an official New Orleans Tour Guide.  With Halloween almost upon us, I read that McFly is going to be conducting ghost tours of the most haunted places in N.O.

My response: “Waycool! I want to go!” I’d been to New Orleans many times before Katrina – and pretty much the whole French Quarter felt haunted. Not a clear building in the place in my view.  It would be interesting to see what it’s like now.

The email, however, is not an invite to visit haunted New Orleans.
It is a request for information to make McFly’s own upcoming ghost tours more juicy, more personalized, more informative, and add value. What better way then to ask his buddy ole ghost busting pal for advice? Having Certified Management Consultant AND Ghostbuster on my curriculum vitae may be a bit over the top to some, but to my buddy McFly, it’s coming in handy right about now.

Did I mention that in my earlier years, I was not a fan of ghosts?
Before I embraced my intuitive abilities, I was unsettled by the general concept of ghosts. And then there was my fear of actually seeing ghosts. And then I was afraid of telling people I saw ghosts.  It wasn’t until I had some very up close and personal one-on-one experiences with ghosts that I realized that ghosts are people too. It was the ghosts that helped me to drop the fear.  They are a gift.

I’m sure I’ve met more than my share of ghosts.
I’ve helped a few go to the light. I’ve done some “ghost busting” for clients – yet no vacuums are involved, nobody gets slimed and, contrary to popular belief, nobody gets busted. I promise.  I have never heard a ghost say” BOO.” Not ever.

McFly had some very specific questions in his email that are probably of interest to you, dear AM Reader.  So read on as I share with you my responses to McFly’s questions about the ghostly realms. I will be posting new ghost-related entries every day this week up until Halloween. Here is McFly’s first question:

#1. What are ‘Ghosts’?
Oh, the much maligned Ghost. Here’s my take. “Ghosts are people too”.  But first, we are all Spirit and we are all vibrating energy.  We who are here on this earthly plane happen to be in physical bodies. When we die, it’s our body that dies. Our Spirit goes to another plane of consciousness – a non-physical realm.

If we don’t “go to the light” as they say on the “Ghost Whisperer”, we actually go to the planes of consciousness closest to the physical plane (a.k.a. earth) called the astral planes.  Those who reside in the astral planes are in a higher energy vibration than earth, but not as high in vibration as those true Spirits who reside in the higher realms.

What’s ego got to do with it?
While residing in the astral planes we are, for lack of a better term, a “Ghost”. Our ego is still pretty much intact.  We retain much of the predominant personality traits and foibles we had on earth. If we die and “go to the light” we go to higher realms of consciousness (and there are many higher realms) where our egos start to dissipate and eventually fall away.  We become our true “Spirit”.

Which realm we go to when we die depends on how far we are on our path – how enlightened we are so to speak. Our personal energy vibration determines where we go. Jesus is in a very high realm. He’s got a high vibration. He’s no ghost. When we go to the higher realms we are still us, along with any outstanding lessons to be learned but we are not weighed down by the baggage created by our earth-bound ego. Note that our ego doesn’t come back into being until after we incarnate back on earth.  Childhood educators estimate our ego begins forming around ages two to three and is fully formed by about age seven – ready to be shaped and twisted more by life’s experiences.

Of course, in reality , we never die. We are very much alive whether we are here in the physical, a ghost in the astral plane or have gone to the light in true spirit form.   We are just energy vibrating at different speeds.

Not all ghosts are ghosts.
Here’s the thing – Spirits who have gone to the light, crossed over, past on, whatever you want to call it, can come back and visit us. They are not ghosts. They are true Spirits. It takes a tremendous amount of energy for a Spirit to come down to our earthly, low vibrating plane of consciousness.  My Dad likens coming into our physical plane like swimming through mud. It’s not such a big dive to come in from the astral planes to here if you are in ghost form. There is less of a difference in energetic frequencies between our physical plane and the astral planes where ghosts hang out. But the veil between realms is getting very thin these days so there are more direct encounters with Spirits, not just ghosts.

Soul tripping on the astral planes.
When alive we regularly visit the astral planes. It’s called astral projection.  We go to this same lower plane (or planes) of consciousness to hang out with loved ones, and those from past lives, and learn more about ourselves.  We usually are not aware of such trips. But sometimes we are:  When you wake up with a dream in your head that is so vivid you remember every detail, you’ve probably been traveling the astral planes. BTW  During sleep, we all astrally-project – but probably not every night.  Our soul leaves our body during these trips,  but we are still tied to our bodies by a chord so we can’t get lost and miss finding our body lying back in bed.  It’s a good thing.

#2.  Why do some people not leave after the body dies?
Many people who die don’t go straight to the light. They hang around to make sure everything is okay with their loved ones. They may hang out a few hours, a day, a week, a month or a couple of months. They are essentially ghosts but they will go to the light. It is pulling them. When they get the big pull towards bliss, or another loved one encouraging them to go, they go to the light. When a person who dies hangs around with no intention of going to the light, or not knowing what the light is, they stay in the lower energetic “ghostly” form.

The “Unfinished Business” factor.
Ghosts don’t leave for a number of reasons, but usually it’s “Unfinished Business”.

• It could be guilt, or shame about something or concern about someone living that keeps them close to the physical plane.
• Sometimes people have died in a traumatic way, and don’t know they have died so they don’t know to go to the light. (But other times a traumatic death, a surprise death, an accident as it were, can actually take them away to the higher realms instantly).
• People who are high on drugs or alcohol have a greater tendency to stay in the ghostly (astral) realms because they are totally confused.
• Some people stay because they aren’t ready to go – they have a message for a loved one and need to see it through.
• Others stay because they were just plain nasty in life – the lower astral planes are full of low lifes – and they are comfortable in that vibration.  They want to keep wreaking a bit of emotional havoc on this side.

A bit more about ghost busting.
As I mentioned, some ghosts don’t leave because they have unfinished business   while others are merely lost and confused.  But the astral planes can be an unhappy place for people who are stuck.  Our higher self – our Spirit – is meant for the higher realms.  “Life” looks  very different at higher vibrations where we can finally experience our true pure nature. So those who “ghost bust” are really just encouraging ghosts to move on to these higher planes of consciousness.

There are ways to show wayward ghosts that they can come back and visit after they cross over, and that seems to clinch the deal for some. If a ghost is still unwilling to go to the light, ghost busters can do things to calm the environment, and if they are Mediums they can act as message bearers to the living and this often will calm the ghost, and possibly encourage them to move on.  And if that doesn’t work, and the ghost is still causing a ruckus in the physical environment, we can often make the environment incompatible with the ghost’s energy and they will often leave.  Not all ghosts will leave.  And not all are ghosts.  More on that later… (Part 2 – Manifestations 101).

Tida (aka The Accidental Medium)

— With thanks to Spirit for infinite return.
(c) 2010, 2011, 2012 The Accidental Medium. UltraMarine Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.

(Continued from Bronte’s Inferno – Part I)

Fast Forward One Month.
Bronte is still integrating the knowledge that past life karma continues to play itself out in this life between her and the loved ones in her world.  I invite her and Tom over for dinner to see how it’s going. Little did I know that unfinished business from this life will present itself tonight.

“Uncle Tom” is roughhousing with the girls, doing their favorite most shriek-filled game. We have footprints above our heads thanks to Tom taking turns with the girls, walking them upside down on the ceiling.

Over the din, I hear that Bronte is embroiled in another family drama.  Sister stuff this time.  Bronte’s feeling as though she’s expected to step up and take care of things when she’s in no frame of mind, or position to do so.  I remind Bronte that families are there to teach us, and this is a test.

“Boundaries, baby, boundaries,” I tell her.  I know all too well that Pisces have boundary issues.  (But it’s also probably why I am such a clear channel – I easily cross the boundary between this and the other side).

Bronte goes into the details of her sister issue.
I see Bronte’s Mom come in behind her as she explains her immediate predicament with Sis.  Suddenly Bronte rockets out on another trajectory. She’s now talking about her family situation long ago, the sister issue suddenly left in the dust.

Bronte recalls caring for her second baby, her first child just out of diapers. As many Mom’s do, especially in the 80’s, Bronte went straight back to work. Marital problems were burbling in the background. The family bank account seemed to have a mysterious leak in it. They’d moved into her in-laws home to stem the flow and get the daily support of extended family. She knew her marriage was fraying at the seams but Bronte doggedly kept moving forward. Exhaustion, work and babies made it easier to ignore the signs.

“The last and only time I had one-on-one time with my Mum happened when she came to visit me when Trisha was a baby. It was about a year before Mum died. With all the kids in our family, I never got to be with Mum alone, in my whole life it seems, so this was really special. Having Mum all to myself. But I was so busy, so much going on. And it wasn’t long before Mum started asking for my brother who lived in the same city”.

Bronte continues, “At first, I kind of ignored it, telling Mum, her son was being the usual self-centered male, blissfully sowing his oats with total disregard for the rest of us.  But then Mum started getting really persistent and wanted to know when he was coming to see her.  I was getting really pissed off at my brother. Where the heck was he? Selfish son-of-a. Why didn’t he bother to return my calls? Show up?  Urrrgggghhhh.”

It’s at about this point, Bronte’s Mom starts shaking her head.
I’m not sure what that’s all about. I don’t say anything to Bronte – that her Mom is standing by her chair. I know any small interruption will shut Bronte down and we won’t get to the bottom of this.

Now Bronte is really getting agitated, thinking about the whole (past) situation. “I finally tracked down my brother and told him to get his behind over here and take over with Mum. She was so obviously bored here and wanted to be with him more than me. When my brother showed up at the door, my Mum was all ready to go.  As she’s leaving she says to my brother “TAKE ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!”

Bronte’s Mom is now shaking her head frantically. From her reaction to her daughter’s words, it’s apparent that this is not what happened at all.

Bronte is shaking her own head. “And that’s when I knew. That I really didn’t have any value.  My husband… and now even my Mum…And that’s when I started drinking. Seriously.’  Her words break into a deep, painful, breathless sob.

In all our times together, all the secrets and hurts she and I have shared, I have never seen Bronte cry. Not once. This is cathartic.

Bronte’s Mom looks at me pleadingly, “DO SOMETHING!!!”
So I leap out my chair, slip around the end of the dinner table and hold a sobbing Bronte in my arms. She’s a dead weight. A drippy dead weight.  The pain is pouring out of her and all over me, both energetically and hydrologic-ally. I look at Bronte’s Mom over her shoulder. She’s telling me telepathically what to do – To fill in for what she did when Bronte was a little girl in distress. I rub Bronte’s back in a big circle. I hold her tight, rock her gently, and soothe her with words. “It’s okay…”

Finally I whisper through my own tears, “That’s NOT what happened, Bronte.” Your Mom is here. She’s telling me that’s not what happened. It’s in your head. She was there because she knew it was bad. She wanted to help, but you cut her out. You didn’t want to talk, or confide in her. You were so busy. No time for her. And she was there for you – to lessen your load. She was so concerned about you. She KNEW your marriage was falling apart. She’s your Mother! She loved you! She loves you now!”

Bronte is gasping between sobs. Bronte’s Mom is now telling Bronte “I LOVE you Bronte. I would never ever do anything to hurt you. I LOVE your feistiness. I should have been more feisty. I am so glad you’re hearing the truth. You know it’s the truth.  It will help you with your writing. It will give you LEEEVerage with your writing.”

Bronte’s Mom repeats, “It will give you great LEEEVerage.”

Bronte starts laughing as she’s crying.
Her Mom doesn’t say ‘leverage’. She says ‘LEEEVERAGE’. Bronte now knows it’s her. “That’s exactly what Mum would say! She was Scottish:  She always mispronounced words like that!”

Bronte’s Mom is now doing this funny little dance – stamping her feet, pumping her little fists up and down. She’s so excited Bronte knows that it’s really her.  “Bronte, your Mom is doing this crazy little dance. I wish you could see it. It’s quite distinctive!”

Now Bronte is bawling. She really knows it’s her Mom.

“Mum had this silly little girl dance, with her fists clenched and stomping her feet. It was so funny!”

I’m laughing, “It IS funny!”

Bronte’s Mom says joyously, “She’s the first (family member) I’ve been able to get through to!”

Bronte gradually pulls herself together. The shift is palpable. Tom is silent, giving Bronte emotional room.  Frankly, I don’t think he knows what to do. Best to keep quiet.

Later that night I give Bronte a huge hug as she and Tom head out the door. “This was a biggie, Hon! You did it! It was a lie – in there, messing with your head all these years. And you cracked it open. Good Job!”

Bronte smiles weakly. She’s spent. Her footing a little unsure, Bronte holds on to Tom’s arm as they walk slowly towards his truck.

After our “session” I go to bed and pick up a book.
I’m exhausted but have the need to read anyway. I’m into the latest book by Colette Baron-Reid.  A highly skilled intuitive, Colette writes about getting a reading from her gifted medium friend John Holland.  Just so happens, at this juncture in the book John Holland channels Colette’s Mom – and the same thing happens. A belief Colette clung to for most of her life about her Mom turned out to be untrue. After that reading, Colette was basically off the radar for days, crying and trying to integrate what she’d learned. I have first-hand knowledge of this kind of shake down process, but it’s nice to hear it shared by another reputable source.

I email Bronte in the morning, asking her outright “So, how goes the shift?”

I continue, “I’ve been reading, and a passage reminded me to pass on this important detail.  There is a process, after a tightly held belief has been shattered, and it is a shake down process. (I relate Colette’s experience to Bronte).  It’s a reminder that you have to take the time to rewire and integrate what you have learned. It’s painful. But if you don’t, it will be much more painful.”

Bronte emails back later with her status thus far. “I’ve been shaken, baby! Cried a lot. But you know, it’s really hard to resist sticking the whole thing into a box I can understand. One thing prevents me from doing that–the word “leeeverage” That’s exactly how Mum would say that word and I realize there’s no way you could have known that.  And that crazy little girl dance…

“I feel ashamed of myself for doubting her.  She was too loving to hurt me but I kept that pain in me for years. I didn’t look at that moment because it was too horrible and then when I finally did, it was too late. She was gone. I thought ‘I can’t fix it now – so…’ Thank you for this.”

I’m always amazed how Spirit does its best to make amends.
Spirit tries to set the record straight with loved ones: Time and space don’t matter.  We usually need help to hear the message.  Something has to shift. We need to be in the right frame of mind to accept something very foreign to our ingrained way of thinking. And be open to change. I guess that’s what I do. Help people to hear these messages when they are ready.

I also see how we must be patient with ourselves. Our mortal integration process of messages from Spirit takes more than a couple of days, to not only know the truth but feel the truth in our core.

Almost two months go by.
Bronte and I are at a gathering. Talking about her struggle with alcohol, Bronte says, “You know, I’ve been following the 12-Step Program, reading the books, trying to walk the talk. But there was something missing that kept derailing me. But when I heard my Mum’s message, when I knew it was her – the things you couldn’t possibly have known…

“I saw what it was: I had this wrong belief, this pain stuck deep inside me. I didn’t even know it was there. But I now realize its significance: How was I going to stop drinking when I had this huge pain to cover up about my Mum? But I found out it was pain based on an illusion. I don’t need the alcohol to cover up a pain that doesn’t exist anymore. I feel the truth in there now. I think it’s getting easier.”

— With thanks to Spirit for infinite return.
(c) 2010, 2011, 2012 The Accidental Medium. UltraMarine Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Childbirth is brutal on your body.
What happens after wards is a big secret your girlfriends don’t tell you about. The sleep deprivation.  Your vital organs jiggling inside you, seemingly unattached to your skeletal structure.  The flabby skin jiggling outside you. Gone is the bikini belly along with the possibility of a perky butt anytime soon.  Then there are the pendulous breasts, clearly not your own, that make you feel like a milking machine. Mooooo.

After I had my second child, I had all sorts of additional minor postpartum issues – like misalignment of my spine, twisted sacrum and a problem with a vein that made my leg muscles ache. Child-bearing is not for whoosies.

But the main issue was my child herself.
Matilda had infant acid reflux and she would turn blue and start to choke if left lying flat for too long. She couldn’t be left alone. I tried feeding her at different times, in different positions, raising her head, raising her bed, putting her to sleep in a baby swing, strapping her into a baby car seat. Nothing worked. Functioning on very little sleep, I finally resorted to sitting up with Matilda in my arms and “sleeping” (I use that term loosely) that way each night for 8 months.

Matilda grew out of her baby reflux, but my aches and pains got worse. On the insistence of my husband who has messed up his own body from sitting at a computer too long, I went to see his massage therapist.

I’m always careful who I choose to work on my body.
It’s not just about skill level of or comfort level with the therapist. As an intuitive, I’m aware of and exposed to all kinds of energies, and with significant lack of sleep, there is always the possibility that a lower vibrating energy may glom on to me.  And there are the times I get scared, frustrated or angry and hold that energy in me.  Whatever the cause, it doesn’t feel good.  And when this lower energy eventually finds itself incompatible with me, it can break off and find somebody else to glom onto. I want my therapist to be protected from any bad energy I might inadvertently bring in.

Then there’s the practitioner’s office – it may not be clear.  The therapist may have worked on somebody else with bad vibes, negative thoughts or what have you – and that low energy may be hanging around ready to meld with the next client’s energy. yuck.

I don’t mean to sound dramatic here.
But you know how some places bring you down and other places lift you up? Some spaces feel leaden and others feel airy?  You know how you are attracted to some people but want to stay well away from others? You may have even experienced a blue funk that seems to hang on to you for a few hours or even a few days after you’ve visited a bummed out friend.  You are experiencing your own clairsentience (ability to feel energy). You’ve been exposed to low vibrating energy.

Meditation transmutes lower energies, as does exercise, relaxing in a warm Epsom salt bath,  spending time with happy people, finding the humor in a situation, laughter, being in nature or other sacred spaces.  If you don’t transmute this energy, it stays in the same low form and if it doesn’t stick to you it looks for another place to roost.

We are all energy. We need to protect our own energy as well as manage the energies around us.

Susan is a tall strong woman and a gentle soul.
A single Mom, she started up her massage therapy services just after her second child was born. Her second child is the same age as Matilda. I don’t know Susan well, but we took our children to the same playgroup.

When I walk into Susan’s treatment room, I see that she practices safe energy management. The room doesn’t feel heavy. It’s an oasis. There’s light orchestral music playing in the background. The faint scent of massage oil and incense floats in the air. There is a huge chunk of glistening purple Amethyst sitting on a side table and a healthy plant on another. Scentless candles burn silently in the corners of the room.

Even though Susan is noticeably careful about keeping her treatment room clear, I can see how this room could hold on to low energy. Fresh air flow and natural light help to easily maintain positive energy in a space:  This room is in a basement. It’s located far from the main reception door that leads to the outside. There are no windows. This is a busy health center. Lots of people in pain. Lots of issues in the tissues release themselves here.

We talk about my issues – my sore back and leg – and how best to proceed. She starts working to relieve the tight muscles I’ve developed holding Matilda for months at a time.

I haven’t told Susan about my abilities – but my husband has.
As she works on my aches, I tell her how I appreciate the effort she takes to keep this space clear. Susan admits that the space is not ideal – she’s renting the room from another health care practitioner.

I comment on her giant half geode of amethyst.  Amethyst is known for its energy transmuting properties – the stone helps to clear and protect a space from holding on to lower energies.  Susan stops to show me her favorite book – the Book of Stones. We share a reverence for these rocks – there is something magical about them. They have a strength and vibration that lifts our spirits, and makes us both feel grounded, strong, clear and centered.

Out of the blue, Susan says, “I need to ask you about something. I’ve only told two close friends. They think it’s just in my head. Maybe you might know what’s going on…”

I listen, my eyes closed. “Sure! What’s up?”

Susan starts slowly. “Well, there’s this balloon…It’s in my house.”

“Okay…”

Susan continues. “This balloon follows me everywhere. It even follows me UP the stairs. And it’s NOT HELIUM! It’s freaking me OUT!” Susan’s anxiety becomes palpable.

I’m thinking out loud, “What color is the balloon? Where is it around you?”

Susan mutters, “I don’t remember the color. It just follows me – it’s around me or just shows up in the room. I keep putting it back in the closet and the next thing I know it’s in the kitchen with me!”

Susan isn’t one to freak out easily.
She’s got a lovely calm way about her. Something is definitely up. There’s a balloon in her house that’s following her around like a dog. It’s wigging her out. Yet she doesn’t get rid of it. hmmmm.

With my eyes still closed, I take three deep breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth. And immediately I see a blue balloon bouncing along invisible air currents and following Susan up a flight of stairs – it’s at her right shoulder.

I’m not thinking, I’m talking. “Has your Dad passed?” I feel he has.

Susan says, “Yes. He died a while back.”

I blurt out. “Did you have a good relationship with your Dad?” I don’t wait for an answer. “No, I don’t think you did. Doesn’t matter. He’s trying to get your attention. He’s trying to help you. So what’s happening with you right now? Something else is going on that’s upsetting you.”

I know next to nothing about Susan’s family. I don’t know how I know, but it’s so obviously her Dad. I don’t even know why it’s obvious. It just is.

Susan pauses. “Well… I’ve been trying to do this quietly. You’re right. I need to be out of this space.  So I’ve put an offer in on the old MacLeary place across from Alan’s Hardware Store. It’s perfect for my family and for running my massage therapy.

“I don’t know if I’ll get it. I don’t know how I’ll get it. I need a mortgage, and I’m a single Mom, and self-employed.  I’ve just started this practice so there’s no business track record. I’m not the best credit risk. And Mr. Alan has been trying to buy that place for years. He’s tried to start a bidding war …

“Luckily, Mrs. MacLeary said she’d prefer to sell to me.  She seems more interested in who gets her house than getting the highest price. But if I can’t get my financing in order fast I won’t be buying it. She needs to sell – she can’t wait much longer. Alan is waiting with a signed check with Mrs. MacLeary’s name on it. I’m stressed.”

Susan goes silent. I get another download.
“Your Dad is trying to make things right with you. Don’t you worry. He’s working in the background. Don’t panic. Just keep moving forward. You are meant to have that house. It’s going to happen soon.”

Faith is a funny thing. You need it most when life gets bumpy and uncertain – and that’s when faith is most difficult to find and hold on to.  Susan is obviously wrung out by this emotional roller coaster. Her ego has taken over, playing this “Will-it-or-won’t it” question in her head. Worrying her. Wearing her down.

I tell Susan, “Do what you can do, and then let it go. It will work out. What else do you need to do to secure the mortgage?”

Susan goes into the details. “My real estate guy says I need to get a co-signer for the mortgage. But the only one is my Mom. But she lives in Florida. But I need to get her to agree to this first, then get all the original documents to her, have her sign them, then get them back to me in time – by the end of the week – then the real estate guys need to do their stuff.  But I just don’t see how that’s all going to happen. It’s too much…”

Susan is overwhelmed. The ‘buts’ are blocking her. I don’t have any rational proof that she can pull this off in a few days, but I am compelled to say, “Just do it. It will happen. Your Dad is on your side. Well, he’s actually on the other side, but he’s pulling some strings. He’s going to make things right with you. After we’re done here, call your Mom, get the documents, call Fedex and get those documents rolling. Then you’ll have done all you can do. Let it go. It will happen.”

One week later.
I walk into Susan’s treatment room. I’m reluctant to pry but I ask anyway. “So… how goes the real estate deal?”

“I got it!!!” Susan bursts into a huge smile.

“I knew it!!!” I think I’m as excited as she is. “And the balloon is blue.”

Susan beams back, “Yes! I wanted to tell you!  The balloon is blue.”

— With thanks to Spirit for infinite return.
(c) 2010, 2011, 2012 The Accidental Medium. UltraMarine Media Inc. All Rights Reserved.